


Things that you wanted to say (you never said)

by PipMer



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Episode: s03e03 His Last Vow, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Missing Scene, One-Sided Relationship, Possibly Pre-Slash, Season/Series 03 Spoilers, Unresolved Romantic Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-15
Updated: 2014-01-15
Packaged: 2018-01-08 19:51:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1136690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PipMer/pseuds/PipMer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock’s eyes flew open, and the complete unexpectedness of it made John drop Sherlock’s hand in surprise.  The sight of that beloved blue-grey-green shade staring at him with such intensity made John’s heart swell. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>  <b>SPOILERS FOR HIS LAST VOW</b></p>
            </blockquote>





	Things that you wanted to say (you never said)

**Author's Note:**

> A missing scene from "His Last Vow". HERE BE SPOILERS!!
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks to prettybirdy979 for a quick once-over, and for coming up with a title so I didn't have to. You're the best!

 

 

John sat by the bedside, hands clasped in front of his mouth.  His thumbs traced paths along his lips as he regarded the still form of his friend.  He counted the breaths as the chest rose and fell.  Up, down.  Up, down.  Up, down.  Steady as a heartbeat. 

 

John closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose as he delved down into his abundant reserves of courage and took a deep breath.  His eyes opened.  He reached out with a trembling, sun-kissed hand and grasped the pale limp one.

 

“Come on, Sherlock,” John whispered, tone laced with fear.  “You made it out of surgery two hours ago.  All you need to do now is wake up.  Please, for me.  Just one more –“

 

He cut himself off as soon as he realised what he had been about to say.  He had already asked for _one_ miracle that had been granted by Sherlock.  Surely asking for another one would be pushing the boundaries of the universe’s generosity.  Could he really be so greedy?

 

But he had only _just_ got Sherlock back.  He couldn’t lose him again so soon, could he?  And just when John had started seeing signs that what he had always assumed were unrequited feelings might just possibly be returned by the great detective.  His mind quickly flew over the most obvious examples.  How weddings weren’t Sherlock’s thing, and yet he had agreed to be John’s best man.  How Sherlock had missed John’s birthday dinner because ‘there’ll be people’, and yet he had endured a packed reception because John had wanted him by his side.  How Sherlock had planned a stag night for him, even though Sherlock rarely drank, and never in pubs.  Time and time again Sherlock had moved beyond his comfort zone solely for John’s benefit.

 

John had loved Sherlock from the side-lines for so long, being certain that his friend would never feel the same.  Then Sherlock had ‘died’, and John’s love for his best friend had been made redundant as he moved on with the help of the lovely Mary Morstan.

 

Now, several months after Sherlock’s return, John wondered if it were truly possible that the detective loved John back.  Was this a recent development?  Did Sherlock come to this realisation during the two years he had been away?  Or had Sherlock _always_ loved him, and John had been too blind to see?

 

Emotion welled up in him.  John leaned forward and cradled Sherlock’s hand in both of his, squeezing gently. 

 

“One more miracle, Sherlock,” John whispered.  “You need to wake up.  There’s stuff we need to talk about.  Things that I want to say.  Please.  Sherlock.” 

 

John brought Sherlock’s hand up to his lips and pressed a kiss to the chapped knuckles, mindful of the IV line.  “Just wake up.”

 

Sherlock’s eyes flew open, and the complete unexpectedness of it made John drop Sherlock’s hand in surprise.  The sight of that beloved blue-grey-green shade staring at him with such intensity made John’s heart swell. 

 

John licked his lips.  “Well,” he said, voice cracking, “look who’s back.”  He tried to keep himself from betraying all the tumultuous feelings swirling inside of him as he stood up and cupped Sherlock’s cheek with his hand.  “Can you say anything?”

 

Sherlock didn’t respond.  His eyes unfocussed and stared blankly past John’s shoulder.  John’s stomach sank.

 

“Sherlock?  Can you speak?  Do you remember what happened to you?”

 

Sherlock blinked, and clarity returned to his eyes.  Relief flooded John, and he squeezed Sherlock’s hand in encouragement. 

 

Then Sherlock spoke one word, and reality crashed down around John with the reminder that it no longer mattered how the two of them felt about each other.  The realisations had come too late.  Perhaps Sherlock could sense what John had been contemplating, and was chiding him for his traitorous thoughts.

 

“Mary.”

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Obviously, this is a missing scene taking place after Sherlock was shot and is recovering in hospital. Turned out a bit angsty? I hope you enjoyed it anyway.
> 
> It probably doesn't need to be said, but this was inspired by John telling Mary in the episode that Sherlock's first word after waking was "Mary".


End file.
